haix, feeling a lil depressed today.
cause of my aunt, although its her bday,
she is still suffering from somthing.
we celebrated her bday at the hospital,
many cried, some were quiet but no one smiled.
it was until that sad period where the atmosphere was less tense.
the cake was brought, candles were litted up, plates were all put around.
the more bday songs we sang, everyone still cried.
it was really a sad birthday. after everything, everyone began to calm down and i talked to my aunt. my aunt was really worried and telling me to take care of my sisters and be a good boy and do my work well. i felt so sad as she was just like my second mother. she watched me grow up from a lil baby till now and she was soo closed to me! i lived with her, she gave me money, she rewarded me. it was as if she was like my real mother. i had a heart to heart talk to her telling her that its time to relax and let go of everything then she can depared peacefully. i really dun wan her to leave but if its God's will, i have absoulute trust in him that something nice will happen despite her leaving us. people who were there with her all finally knew the truth.
i will know work hard knowing that she will always be there for me whether here or up there!
i love you a yi, and i want the best for you. i'll continue to pray for you and i want you to feel happy always. going through this suffering now is like walking in a dark forest but once you have walked through the forest something nice will be waiting for you. just live everything up to the good lord ayi. its time to relax and slowly let go of everything. you will always be in my heart and no matter what you will always be my ayi. iloveyouayi, i really do and because i love you, trust and believe in the lord, i'm sure he wants the best for you too ayi. i really hate to see you cry because when you cry all of us all feels it..
please lord, take the cup of suffering away from ayi and hopefully a mirical happens to her please lord i beg you...

still now... despite being at home now and posting this post i feel still disheartened and cry softly at times. maybe it is time for all of us to stay relaxed and give up everything and let the lord decide what is actually best for us before all of us feel peacefull at heart.

i love you ayi and you will always be in my heart.....