hi guys! (:
before i get to my post i wanna say somethings & thank some people (:

> omg mr ivan! how come my shirt will have a marking and only me T_T
> but anyway,,, THANKYOU ivan for helping to make the class tee
> THANKYOU luke for the cheering up :D can't wait to see the pressent :O
> THANKYOU calyn for featuring me (: [ i featured you too xP ]
> THANKYOU johnson sir for giving me alot of words of encouragement! [those words really showed me motivation to do well and work hard!]
> THANKYOU Eugene for telling me the bdays haha & about the motivation & advice (:
> THANKYOU denise for the very nice present although i'm still puzzled wads it LOLS :X

ok lets talk about today..

went to mass, laughed a lil cause Fr luke said some money jokes haha.

anyway waited for denise and was wondering where she was o.O
saw mr ma wai cheong! & said hi glad he joined RCIY.
anyway sms-ed denise and then she said where you and i'm like .. where youu too?
haha then guess wad?
i turned behind and she was right behind me LOLLS!!
cute right? x3
anyways, she gave me a present (: from phill.
thanks denise you're one of my really good good friends (:
IOU one! (: haha but i really don't know wad it is. my father said it was a friendship band. i'll put up the pic of it one day when i'm free (:
but.. THANKS DENISE! <33 x33
ok so its a FRIENSHIP BAND really nice yea? (:





ok went back home and then started watching tv after that my mum came up and said lets have lunch at the cofee shop. ok lor (: then went to S11 ( i don't know wads the new name but always know that shop as S11 lols xD)
ate claypot rice, filling and lovely :D
drank teh see peng :D
ate with the family (:

after that watched tv with my dad until sleep ><
haha, slept for only awile only, then woke up.
my grandparents came to look after my sisters then me, my mum & dad went to ssee ayi.

ok so heres the part where it gets emotional D':<

the moment i stepped into the hospice, i felt evtremely nervouse and worried.
so the nurses were cleaning ayi up & so i tried to calm myself down.
the feeling was like getting back the SAs RESULTS. funny but scary TT

anyway i saw ayi, and i cried ):
she looked SOOOOOOOOO diffrent compared to when it was her birthday.
she slimed down soo much! her face totally diffrent cause she was like so sad and pain ):

i walked to her and said hi ayi the she noticed and wave.

i think ever since she was in the hospice she stopped talking ( she still talks only like a little and its very soft she normally talks one word or just nods her head - it think it is a sign that yea you know & thaat now it actually is EFFORT for her doing all this because it is very pain for her and tiring), she just began to sleep & started to talk less and less. she only nods & one word ans for replys.

she started to cough and then vomited, thank god my mum knew what to do. the nurse said that she actually vomitted out gastric juice cause she didn't eat ):

i cried even more..

my mum asked me to talk to ayi, i talked to her but i cried ==" so i head to bring it all in and talk to her. it felt good tlaking to her. but i think ayi wass sooo tired and shse didn't want to hear me so she asked me to stop.

my mum said nbm cause she;s in this stage where she has achieved acceptence, and where she begins to shut herself from the outside world and begin for departure )':

anyway so ok (: but then her leg was pain cause speaded to her bone. my father told me how pain was it. like imagine now... that someone is digging your nail, cause you have a ingrowth toenail, the pain is like creepy cause someone touching the "flesh". dad said ayi's pain is like 3x worse then tat ):

anyway i just cried & cried so much. her leg was pain yea then asked the nurse to give her , her mophine to stop the pain. then the nurse moved ayi's leg, ayi actually screamed cause it was soo pain a tear dropped out ):
i saw ayi, she kept messaging her kidney there but the bone there i could tell that her entire body hurt so much! sob sob ):

we prayed the rosary and we prayed all : the joyfull, light, sorrowfull, glorius mystries. i normally cant concentrate but i did, when i we were saying the rosary, i saw ayi and like thought of last time when she was still good and proper healthy lecturing me about my studies and now she's groaning in pain every second ):

i really really feel sad )=

anyway.. we said good bye to her and she noticed and did a weak wave.

i guess that she really is different now, she only weak waves back & nods her head and sometimes weak ans ):

poor ayi, all i can hope for is that for her suffering to be lesssen and that she can start to accept God and to departure peacefully (':

after that we went to see the nurse and talked about how long will ayi get to live and why is she suddenly still lik that. and omg, i saw that ayi had to take so many medication and the nurse also said that because of the huge and different amt of mediciane she consumes there is some chemical reaction which is causing her to feel nausure. ):

ayi also didn;t eat or drink.. these are all signs i guess..
& the nurse said that she would'nt be around for long soon.. )'=
sobs! ): i really am sad and crying! ):

after we went back home

and i had my dinner

then i did my homework

and now i'm blogging.

sob sob... D<

anyway i do hope i can get some of the results back.

( sorry for the long post and maybe some parts were too wierd abt the ayi thingy, this post i didn't really wanna put evrything cause it would be too painfull for me)

i think i'm starting to accept the fact that ayi is going to departure soon...
haix,, ayi, i'll pray for you evryday.
and hope that you can be peacfull (:

i really hope that ayi's departure soon will not affect me & my studies >< haix, but yea it is all lord's way he wants it.

anyways byebye (':